Wrestling & the C's - Powe through West

Leon Powe is a ferocious competitor and rebounder. He uses his aggressiveness to make the most of limited playing opportunities. For example Powe only played 1 minute and 23 seconds in the C’s recent win over the Bucks. However, as the seconds ticked away he was the only Celtic still playing defense, desperately trying to prevent Milwaukee from cutting into the 20-point deficit. His overall attitude and approach embody one of the greatest names in the history of wrestling – the Junk Yard Dog. And just as Leon had to overcome several knee operations, JYD battled through his blinding at the hands of the Fabulous Freebirds. Finally, JYD was always a popular face, particularly with children. Similarly everyone seems to like Powe based upon his attitude and what he’s been through.

Theo Ratliff was an excellent defensive player in his prime. According to NBA.com he blocked 262 shots and in one three month stretch averaged 4.2 blocks per game in 2002-03. Unfortunately Ratliff’s career has been plagued by injury, which includes losing the current season to a back ailment. In picking a WWF comparison I wanted a guy who had his own devastating back injury. I settled on Mr. Perfect, Curt Henning, who lost nearly 3 years in his prime. Furthermore, just as Ratliff excelled at defense, Mr. Perfect had a specialty as well – technical wrestling. Finally, while both Ratliff and Henning were definitely above average, they were a step below two men they will forever be associated with – Dikembe Mutumbo and Bret the Hitman Hart.

Heading into February 12th Allan Ray was shooting an abysmal 19% (10-51) from the field at home versus an excellent 50% (31-61) on the road. Mike Gorman is completely mystified by this development. I recognize that he did drop 22 on Atlanta and 20 against the Wizards 5 nights later. However, Ray is currently a jobber. If he’s getting big minutes it is trouble for the C’s. So for now I’m comparing Ray to one of the greatest jobbers of all time, Duane Gill. Hopefully, the former Villanova standout will develop into a 3-point assassin and become a real rotation guy. Until that happens he will be a jobber with a very similar name to an established superstar, just as Gill is most remembered for his infamous Gillberg character.

Rajon Rondo is one of the most exciting Celtics rookies in quite some time. Despite the fact that he is not a great shooter, something anyone who writes exclusively about basketball for ESPN contractually has to point out, he’s got a ton of potential. This is due in large part to his big hands, great motor, rebounding ability, willingness and ability to run, and the fact that he appears to obtain that X factor. I won’t compare him to Bob Cousy. However, The Truth has gone as far as to say that Rondo has top 5 point guard potential. In honor of every bold prediction ever made about Rondo I’m going to go out on a limb here and dial up the Ultimate Warrior. Just as Rondo has many aforementioned strengths The Ultimate Warrior had the theme song, the energetic approach, strangely effective mic skills, and the fan following. Unfortunately the Warrior lacked technical skills, dedication to his craft, and reliability. He never fully put it together as this DVD explains so well. So I’m hoping that Rondo is like the Warrior right around the time he defeated Hulk Hogan at Wrestlemania VI. On the verge of something great. But I never want to watch The Self Destruction of Rajon Rondo with commentary from David Stern, Marc Stein, Ric Bucher, David Thorpe, and the immortal John Hollinger.

When I started this activity I got a call from Tom Heinsohn and he made one demand, “You better make the wrestling equivalent of Brian Scalabrine a red head or else this whole thing is a farce.” Thankfully Bob Backlund was a perfect fit. And not just because of the hair:

1. They both had significant accomplishments in college – Backlund won the NCAA Division II wrestling championship while Scal played at USC.

2. Backlund was not a flashy wrestler. Rather he was praised for his technical ability just as Danny Ainge, Tom Heinsohn, Mike Gorman, Doc Rivers and others frequently highlight Scal’s mental approach to the game.

3. Finally, would there be a more appropriate wrestling move for a guy nicknamed Veal than Backlund’s crossface chickenwing.

* Important note – I’m not talking about Backlund’s first run in the WWF when he held the title. Rather I’m looking at his second stint during the 90s where he feuded with the younger generation. While Scalabrine seems to get along with the young C’s, he is one of the elder statesmen on this Celtics squad, despite not being that old himself.

Wally Szczerbiak – I’ve got it on good authority (any woman I’ve ever talked to who has seen a Celtics game) that Wally is a good-looking guy. He has clearly emerged as the team’s heartthrob, edging out Delonte West in the process. Similarly, there was a time where Ravishing Rick Rude was the WWF’s resident sex symbol. I’m not comfortable enough to dive into that comparison any further so I’ll move onto their respective skills. Wally has been a very good player in his NBA career. He made the All Rookie team (1999) and even one All Star Squad (2002). However, he is by no means a superstar like teammate Paul Pierce. Meanwhile Rick Rude was an accomplished wrestler in his day. But he generally competed for the Intercontinental belt. He wasn’t in Hulk Hogan’s class. Finally, for some unexplained reason I think Wally would be a great heel.

Sebastian Telfair – It’s important for me to note that I like Sebastian Telfair. I’m not entirely convinced that Doc Rivers is ruining the young point guard but he does not seem to be developing him either. Furthermore, I have a hard time evaluating Bassy because of all of the hype that surrounded him before he even played a minute of pro ball. Unfortunately if there is a heel on what is by all accounts a likeable team it is probably Telfair. First there was the infamous “Get over here and take care of it” incident. He was never charged but it did not sit well due to the gun incident from Portland. There have also been some rumblings that Bassy is not well liked in the locker room and I thought his commercial was weak. So Telfair is…drum roll…The Million Dollar Man. Vince McMahon gave Ted DiBiase a ton of cash upon his arrival in the WWF. The same happened to Telfair as he received $5 million from the Blazers and possibly $12 million from Adidas. However, just as the Million Dollar Man could not buy the championship belt from Hulk Hogan, Bassy’s money has not led to a consistent starting spot. Also when Telfair leaves the C’s via free agency for the Knicks next season it will be just like when DiBiase joined the WCW. If you’re scoring at home Portland has to be the equivalent of DiBiase’s start in Mid-South Wrestling.

There are a lot of different ways I could go with this Delonte West comparison. There is the fact that the C’s have been yanking him around about his position in his first three seasons. The numerous flip flops between shooting guard and point guard are reminiscent of a wrestler getting alternating between heel and face too often. As a player Delonte has a solid basketball IQ and has shown flashes of excellent shooting between bouts with injuries. At best he is probably a 3rd or 4th guard on a good team. So maybe he calls to mind an unsuccessful contender for the Intercontinental Championship Belt. However, I’m going to focus on Delonte’s mic skills instead. His epic wire hanger commercial and “I’m just a playa. I’m a playa Greg. And I just play with whatever they put and you gonna play with a sock you gonna pay with a sock” are right up there with Rowdy Roddy Piper’s “Just when they think they've got the answers, I change the questions." In fact it’s time for FSN to scrap the Marshall Plan and replace it with West’s Wing, an interview show loosely formatted off of Piper’s Pit. Can you imagine West turning on old friend Jameer Nelson prior to a Magic game just as Piper turned the tables on Jimmy Superfly Snuka? The possibilities are endless.